Pirates of South Pacific

'Tis a Pirate's Life for Us

2020, you're the worst. We were living in Warsaw. In the city center. When hard lockdown happened, the police were parked on the square under our window, blasting a message for everybody to stay home, on repeat. We had a bigger sound system though, so we drowned them out with NWA's Fuck Tha Police. In hindight, should have been Hemp Gru's Nienawiść (the Polish equivalent) - but we got what we wanted, they tried and failed to get into our building and after half an hour or of looking very confused turned that shit down. Long story short, we ended up so depressed by lockdown Warsaw we didn't even have the energy to pick up our shit and move back to Canada. We needed something more exciting than that. And there is one place in the world I have always dreamed of going.

French Polynesia. The ultimate paradise, and the ultimate test of my budget travel skills (it is, typically, prohibitively expensive but I have already done some research and the prices went down significantly in the pandemic lull.) The flights were cheaper, and the accomodations, especially for long term bookings, were down to 30% of their typical price. If not now, when. So we set out - this might be a once in a lifetime thing, so we were going to do this right. 5 weeks in Tahiti to settle in and get to know the place. Do the nearby Moorea in the meantime. Then move on to other islands, decide the details as we go. A throrough exploration of paradise.

There is a reason the flight from Paris to Pappeete (22 hours, mid-way landing in Vancouver for refueling) was so cheap - you have to take a Covid test before flying. If you’re positive, you’re out. The tests in Poland are a joke, so we took it as an excuse to see our Berlin friends for the first time since the pandemic started. It all already felt much less hopeless than the Warsaw we left behind.

I imagine by the time anyone reads this, the Covid test will be a common enough experience that there is no need to describe it. Suffice to say, we passed. Despite some setbacks at Tegel airport we managed to get to Paris and board the flight to Papeete. At boarding, a flight attendant checked our test results, health declarations and temperature. And we were let onto a plane to paradise. Far away from world torn between an epidemic and recession, and fast approaching the fork in the road between revolution and genocide. There is none of that here. No, on the islands of South Pacific we are as far from these concerns as we can be. Eva and Brett, Pirates of the Southern Seas, tired of humanity’s bullshit.

So anyhow, we've landed in Tahiti. It sounds pretty nuts, but we’re here.

We’re in the world’s navel. Time zone exactly 12 hours behind the one we departed. The AirBnB is right at the western seaboard and we hear the roar of the waves all night. The beach is black volcanic sand and the water is neon blue. We have this place for 5 weeks, and plan to use it as a base to thoroughly explore Tahiti and Moorea, and then… who knows? It was a one-way flight. We can stay in French Polynesia for up to 3 months. The internet is good enough that we can both work remotely. Time zones are nuts though – an Ontario work day starts at 3AM for us. And today we bought a couple of inexpensive bikes, and rode them back from Pappeete to Puna’Auia. They’re gonna get a lot of use in the coming months.

We already feel like we’ve reclaimed 2020.

Brett made a hyperlapse video of a walk along the beach downstairs: